FORGIVENESS
Sirach 27:30-28:7; Psalm 103; Romans 14:7-9; Matthew 18:21-35
There are certain reasons people find it difficult to forgive, for example if the hurt runs deeper than just the offense itself. Unforgiveness can come from emotional pain, repeated offenses, and the fear of being hurt again, which makes opening up feel unsafe.
More so, it can come from ego, pride and the desire for justice can make it hard to let go, especially when there is no apology, remorse or accountability. Forgiveness also gets complicated in close relationships, under social pressure, or when the act damaged someone’s identity, reputation, or trust. And sometimes people simply have not processed the grief and anger yet, so letting go seems impossible.
Yet today’s readings challenge us to break the chains of unforgiveness and learn to forgive as God forgives us. The Gospel reading today teaches that forgiveness must not have a fixed limit (MATHEMATICAL LIMIT). The first reading connects forgiveness with receiving mercy from God, while Psalm 103 reminds us that the Lord is compassionate and merciful, slow to anger and rich in mercy. Let’s break this into the following points:
1. GOD’S MERCY HAS NO LIMIT: Peter asked Jesus, “How often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus answered, “Not seven times, but seventy times seven” (Matt.18:21-22). Peter asked this question because the Jewish rabbis at that time taught that forgiving someone more than three times was unnecessary, citing Amos 1:3-13, where God forgave Israel’s enemies “for three transgressions, and for four” yet later struck them.
However, the text does not imply limit to forgiveness but patience with stubborn hearts. Three represents a complete or full measure. Four represents an excess or breaking point – more than enough. So, rather than showing a God who strictly counts to four before cutting off grace, the text teaches God’s patience. God did not strike at the first, second, or even third offense. He waited, giving ample opportunity for change, until the wickedness became entirely inexcusable. So we can say that God struck them not because his mercy or forgiveness reached a mathematical limit but because they were actively, continuously committing atrocities without remorse.
The rabbis took a poetic idiom about God’s patience in Amos and weaponized it into a rigid, numerical cap on mercy known as the Rabbinic three-strike rule. Peter was operating under that exact “limit mindset” when he offered the number seven. Jesus corrected him by revealing that true divine forgiveness has no mathematical limit or tracked on a ledger. So, Peter was thinking in terms of a limit. Jesus was teaching him the language of grace. Beloved, Christian forgiveness is not about counting offences; it is about reflecting the mercy we have received from God. If God keeps forgiving us, who are we to place a permanent limit on the forgiveness we offer others? The principle is, as long as genuine remorse and repentance persist, God’s forgiveness persists. But where unrepentant atrocity and cruelty persists, God’s judgment eventually falls.
2. FORGIVENESS OPENS THE DOOR TO MERCY: Sirach asks a powerful question: “Does anyone nourish anger against another and expect healing from the Lord?” (28:3). How can we ask God for mercy while refusing to show mercy to others. Jesus teaches us to pray, “Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us” (Matt 6:12). The servant in today’s Gospel received enormous mercy from his master, but refused to extend even a little mercy to his fellow servant. He had received mercy but refused to become merciful. We have been blessed but refuse to be a blessing, we have knowledge but refuse to teach others, we have connection, but refuse to share it or assist. See, do not become an obstacle to your own spiritual growth by holding tightly to unforgiveness or greed.
3. UNFORGIVENESS DAMAGES THE HEART: Jesus teaches that reconciliation matters. In Matthew 5:23-24, He says that if we remember that our brother has something against us, we should first go and make peace. Unforgiveness does not punish only the person who hurt us; it can also imprison the person who refuses to let go. Holding anger is like carrying a heavy load and expecting the other person to feel the weight. It can lead to stress, poor sleep, anxiety and irritability. Beloved, forgive, it does not mean pretending that the offence never happened. It means refusing to allow the offence to control your heart and your relationship with God and others.
4. BE SLOW TO ANGER: Psalm 103 says that the Lord is “slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.” If God is slow to anger with us, we too must learn to be slow to anger with others. It is dangerous for us to be quick to anger. God who created the heavens and the earth is slow, be slow to anger. The servant who had been forgiven went out and immediately grabbed his fellow servant and demanded payment. See, control your temper. Not every offence deserves an explosion; not every disagreement deserves a broken relationship. As Proverbs 14:29 says, “Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding.” Quick anger can destroy in minutes what took years to build.
5. FORGIVE AS ONE WHO HAS BEEN FORGIVEN: At the heart of today’s message is this: We forgive because we have been forgiven. The debt we owe God is far greater than any debt another person may owe us. We have received mercy again and again. Therefore, let us not become Christians who constantly ask God for mercy but refuse to give mercy to others. “…The measure you give is the measure you will get back (Luke 6:38). Forgiveness is not weakness; it is freedom.
Prayer
Lord, give us the grace to be slow to anger, quick to forgive and rich in mercy. Amen.
Fr. Daniel Evbotokhai
